I thought this discussion was excellent, and useful. It’s hosted by Marni Kinrys and Kristen Carney; each of them has her own YouTube channel and both have businesses coaching men about women and about dating. I’m somewhat familiar with Marni Kinrys’ channel (she brands herself as Your Persona Wing Girl), but not Kristen Carney’s.
Marni’s advice seems reasonable and useful. But, like much self-help advice, it’s not usable right “out of the box,” as it were. It’s the sort of advice that must be internalized to be useful; that takes practice. She offers courses, which may take one closer to internalization, and one-on-one coaching, which may be even better. But I don’t know, as I’ve not done either; I’ve only listed to some videos.
In any event, while this video is presented as yet more advice for (hapless) men, it makes more sense to think of it as a conversation between women that is interesting in and of itself. I would think it interesting to other women as well as to men. Marni and Krystin have Dr. Tina Schermer Sellers as their guest. She’s an educator and sex therapist, and seems quite sensible to me.
Their topic is shame, which interests me a great deal. A couple of months ago I had a conversation with Claude about it. For what it’s worth, Schermer’s remarks are consistent with a number of things in that conversation. She’s interested in and advocates a practice of childhood sexual education that starts in toddler-hood and continues into the teens. What she says in the podcast strikes me as being quite sensible, and, alas, utterly foreign to my own experience growing up and, I’m sure, to many others as well. Her remarks give me hope for the future, that there really is a better way. But we’ve got lots of harmful cultural practices to jettison.
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